Cat Mad Crochet

Estimated reading time: 11 minutes

Confession: I watched Boo, Bitch when it first came out in 2022. I enjoy a little creepy viewing around Halloween, yet tween style scary is about as far as I can go without giving myself nightmares. So I watched it and liked it. I did notice the crochet. I did read people’s thoughts about fast fashion crochet and what it means for workers, both foreign and domestic, that the show generated. What I never did was actually look up the pieces in the show where they were for sale to learn more. I am late to the game. Most of the pieces are actually no longer being sold because of the fashion cycle’s tendency to shift like a strobe light. So here, slow but still engaged, are my thoughts on the crochet in Boo, Bitch. I’m going to start with the actual crocheted pieces and move on to the wanna be pieces. 

Gia’s bag

This is classic, in the round granny square construction. You can, but not in this picture, make out the stitches and the chains in the strap. This is decidedly crochet. Funny thing about it though is that it doesn’t turn up in discussions of crochet in Boo, Bitch. Literally not anywhere that I can find do they ever mention this bag. I guess it’s subtle? Blue on blue as it is. It shows up in the scene where Erika is about to kiss Jake C but runs back to tell Gia goodbye and the whole earbuds thing starts. This is the only scene with this cute bag. I guess it got missed, which is a shame because it is cute! Perhaps it was picked up at a thrift shop or made for the show so was overlooked because it wasn’t readily buy-able from some chain store.

I’m not one for granny squares, but this is a good use of them. Personally, I would replace it with another square motif because I deeply hate granny stitch, but there are plenty of square motifs out there. There are also patterns to buy, which I normally don’t talk about here because I want to encourage people to try their own things; however, since someone might want to recreate this but not be ready to try out their own patterns yet, I will suggest one. 

I like Thread Eclectica’s cute little sunflower bag on Etsy. Granny Square Bag Crochet Pattern, Siouxsie Sunflower Pocket Crossbody Bag, Crochet Sling Bag, Easy Crochet Project PDF Digital Download – Etsy It’s a cute small bag and would really give you the feel of this bag while knowing the fast fashion industry has no power over you or your hook. The bag from the show has uncertain origins, but if it is fast fashion, stick it to them and support a designer. Vote with your dollars!

Erika’s interviewer’s cowl

Again, a clearly crocheted piece but the discussions all missed it. Perhaps it, too, was either made for the show or purchased as a unique piece from a craft show or a thrift shop. As for the piece itself, if that’s not back-post single crochet ribbing, I’ll eat a hook. Okay, I won’t but I’m pretty sure it is. It’s a shame this cowl got lost in the discussion, too, because this is a really good piece. The stripes are well done, the colors go well together, and it drapes really well. My guess is this is something like the “Single Crochet V-Stitch” from the Crochet Every Way Stitch Dictionary.

I’ve worked with this stitch pattern before and in a fingering weight yarn and 4 mm hook, you get something very like the look of this cowl. I would work two rows for each color, and I would do post stitch ribbing if I wanted to replicate it. 

Gia’s tank

This one did make the discussions and it really is crochet. It was originally sold by Free People. I am far too late to see the original listing, but the PoshMark listings call it a mid-weight knit fabric. Now I know this is some random person selling some random piece of clothing, but it does get my hackles up a bit. This is crochet. First you can see the stitches. Those are double crochets, possible post stitches. Secondly, crocheted fabric, because of how the stitches are made, will always be a bit thicker than knit fabric created with the same size yarn. You can basically double the yarn size if you use it for crochet. This is exactly why I work in tiny yarns: The buggers grow alarmingly when you start stitching. Because of this thickness, the seller lists it as a mid-weight knit not realizing the thickness comes from it being crochet. For those who know, the thickness, even with lace weight yarn, is a tell for crochet.

I think this is just double crochets or a similar, slightly puffier stitch over and over and over with some cute embroidery on top. It looks like the original maker used a fairly large hook to create a porous fabric. If I was trying to remake this, I would choose a closed stitch pattern with some fun texture like the Marguerite stitch. I would use singles for the edges and the button placket.

Liars, thieves, and charlatans! The fake crochet

There were several pieces that made the discussion boards and really got people going about fast fashion and fair wages. These are worthy topics and must be discussed. I just wish they had focused on actual pieces of crochet to have those discussions.

Gia’s pants

I took this picture right from my screen. Those pants didn’t read as crochet to me when I watched the show, but, looking at what other people were talking about and the buy the look sites after I finished watching the series, they kept coming up. Why? Nothing there looks like a crochet stitch. So I did some googling.

First, I learned these were made by Zara and I think they were referred to as crochet in the original listings. Definitely fast fashion of the worst kind. Then I found a reseller who took a lot of pictures. This is a shot of the label, for which I care nothing. What fascinated me here is the construction. I have never seen or made crochet like this. It looks more woven than anything else. Also of interest, though, is that these pants are being resold as “Granny square pants”, a classic crochet technique. But here the construction is done in long rows up and down the pants while granny squares are made in the round and then joined to create the fabric. Those are not traditional granny squares at all. 

I suppose you could make the pants from top to bottom without motifs, but you would need to work either in tapestry or stranded crochet. If these pants were made with either of these methods, you would either get stiffer pants because you were working over the not in use colors as in tapestry crochet, or you would see the stranding in stranded colorwork, but you don’t. This is not crochet. I’m not entirely sure what it is, but I am fairly comfortable saying these are not crocheted pants.

I think the next two pictures drive that point home even more.

What even are the white lines running through the design? I’ve woven strands through my crochet. It doesn’t look like this. 

Gia’s vest

I didn’t think this was crochet either when I watched it the first time because it isn’t. I found the original listing. It isn’t even listed there as crochet.

Do you see what I see? “Nothing but knit”? This was sold by American Eagle (so fast fashion) as a Patchwork Button-Up Sweater Vest. No one mentioned crochet. But if you go looking for how to shop for the looks from the show, this vest gets listed as crochet and discussions about crochet just ran with that. 

Look, we need to talk about the people being forced to churn out garment after garment after garment for next to nothing whether they are crocheting or sewing or using some other means of creating garments. These people are treated like disposable cogs in the wheels of fashion, and it is horrible. We should all be horrified and demand change. Because of our own problems with poverty in the Western world, though, some people are going to need to shop at inexpensive places to get what they need. It isn’t a choice. There are so many parts to this issue, and it is not going to be solved by me. I will let those more voiced in the issue speak to it, and I will be here ready to listen while I read and educate myself about the issue.

All of that being said, we also need to talk about fast fashion using the word “crochet” to monopolize on a trend when the items they sell only imitate (poorly) the look of crochet. It cheapens the look and creation of our craft. Crochet is one of the only fiber arts that has to be done by hand. We create the fabric and the garment as one act. The sewist likely didn’t weave the fabric. The person sewing knit sweaters together likely didn’t also knit the fabric. Probably a machine (set up and maintained by humans) either wove or knitted the fabric. One could make a case for levels of poor wages in those processes, and they would be right to raise the point, but a manufacturer had to pay twice for a woven or knitted garment: Once for the weaving or knitting and once for the sewing together. For a crocheted garment, you pay once but you get both processes. 

So if a person sewing together a sweater gets the same piece rate as a person crocheting a sweater, the crocheted garment is cheaper to produce overall because they can make one person do two jobs for the same crappy pay. But that is changing because for reasons known only to them (The slow creation rate of crochet? Limited workers with the skills to create as many crocheted pieces as they need/want? Public outcry against fast fashion? General evilness and a desire for more money despite the harm they do to people and the environment?), the fast fashion industry has figured out a way to create crochet-look-alike fabric using knitting machines. People who crochet can see the difference right away while other people will never see it. The industry can churn out more pieces and they go away happy. Perhaps this is better for the workers since no one is being forced to crochet so many pieces. But other workers are filling in the void with knit pieces, so I’m not sure if it’s even an overall win for stopping fast fashion. But that leaves us with the question: What of crochet as a craft in this light?

There are far too many people out there who already think that crochet is a bad craft capable only of granny squares and washcloths. What happens when the knit “crochet” becomes more popular than the real crochet because it conforms to people’s idea of what fabric should feel like and it’s super cheap? How do people new to the craft, expecting “crochet” knit fabric, deal with the difference? Does this expectation drive people away from crochet as a hobby?

Crochet is different from knitting and it needs special considerations and design knowledge to do well. There are too few resources other than a lot of time and trial and error to become truly versed in crochet design. This means that anything that undercuts crochet as a better way to make it, even though it isn’t it at all, could really damage the craft, at least in terms of selling pieces and having our work appreciated. We need to call out fake crochet as fake. We need to get better at recognizing real crochet and singing its praises. We also need to fix the fast fashion problem. I love seeing crochet in shows and movies and hearing people wonder at it. I hate knowing any bit of it is because a fellow crafter suffered.

Go watch Boo, Bitch. It’s weird and has a ghost. Tis the season.

One more thought. Erika apologizes to the head of the prom committee for destroying her “beautiful crocheted banner”. I have watched and re-watched that scene so many times. Sometimes specifically trying to see the crochet. Where is it? The banner is destroyed and we see it being ripped apart like sheets of paper. Flat sheets of paper. Nothing about the banner is crocheted unless someone wrote the word crochet on it somewhere and the writers are counting that. Why can’t crochet get a little respect?

Now go. Watch it for yourself. If you can point out the crocheted banner in the prom presentation assembly, I would be grateful because it’s driving me mad.